Bueller Bueller
Home 2
6 Months old / 2 months adjusted
We have been home 10 weeks now and time has flown by. The day to day honestly feels so normal, our NICU life has drifted into a place in the back of my mind. Although it will always be there and painful, it’s hanging out back.
With the exception of the eye tests for ROP that we are still doing as an outpatient. I tell you these ones never get any easier. Kaydens probably done somewhere near 20 of them now and they still feel like mid evil baby torture. Somedays I’m brave and I get my hands in to help calm him and other ones I stand back. Nearly all eye tests end in me going to get BK and a frozen coke to feel better. He still has stage 2, zone 2 ROP. It’s stable and so they will continue to test him every few weeks.
Somedays I wish we could just do the laser eye or injections and never do another one of these tests. And then I think he is the master of self healing and with more time it could improve. He does seem to be looking and tracking. He is making more eye contact and watches me from his bouncer as I move around the house.
Thankfully they are every few weeks.
He has a few other minor things going on but they can be put down to being a baby. In light of his journey torticollis and bottle adversion isn’t an big obstacle for us.
We are focusing on the present and enjoying the summer.
We have been getting out and about a lot. When strangers admire Kayden and ask
“Oh, how old is baby?” I find myself having this paused moment. It’s like a brief freeze where I can pick from his adjusted or actual date. Sometimes, I joke to friends that I choose the answer depending on how much chat I want to follow but more often I choose his actual age. I am so proud of him and the success of our journey. I enjoy the shock on people’s face to learn this newborn looking dude is actually 6 months old.
Or maybe it’s more, maybe it’s letting people know that these tiny babies can survive. That I’m holding a tiny miracle in my arms right in front of them and maybe they could feel the joy and amazement that I do. And if by chance that person knows someone who’s “best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with a girl” who is going through the NICU journey and it gave them hope, then it matters.
